The 5 Out of 5 Hearts Club: Mallywood Smoky Mama! Mascara
The “5 Out of 5 Hearts Club” ❤❤❤❤❤ is a new series where you’ll find out about beauty products that are all that and a bag of baked Cheetos! — a.k.a. perfection in every single way.
No shame moment: I’m one of those creepers who walks around unabashedly staring at strangers’ lashes without any qualms whatsoever. At times, it’s been so intense that people have stopped me to ask, “Do I know you?” and I’m like, “Nah, I’m just admiring your lashes like a weirdo. Don’t mind me!”
If I saw someone wearing this mascara, I’d pull them aside (after popping my eyes back into their sockets) and inquire about the magic happening on their fringe, because it’s good — like, “Gee, where did this dark horse come from, and why isn’t it a cult favorite yet?” good.
“Apply on the top lashline as usual (you can define every lash with this wand!). Then it gets fun! As you apply to your bottom lashes, gently press the wand softly from side to side and barely touch the skin beneath them! Voila! No walk of shame necessary!”
My lashes refuse to hold a lash curl (they’re rebellious that way, I guess), and they’re short, and I have a big ol’ gap in my right eye from an incident involving the overzealous removal of a pair of falsies, but with two coats of this mascara, I look like I’m wearing lash extensions.